Castle of Glass
by Chelsea Lynn
Summary: "You don't have the slightest idea what I've been through, Malfoy." "That's where you'd be wrong." He replied, his eyes locking with hers. "I know something not even your dear Potter knows." She folded her arms across her chest and frowned. "And what, pray tell is that?" He leaned closer and whispered in her ear, "I know how your nightmare ends."


"You have no idea what you're talking about, Malfoy." She snapped. "You don't have the slightest idea what I've been through."

"That's where you'd be wrong." He replied, his eyes locking with hers. "I know something not even your dear Potter knows."

She folded her arms across her chest and frowned. "And what, pray tell is that?"

He leaned closer and whispered in her ear, "I know how your nightmare ends."

**Summary: It's been seven years since Hermione's mother was murdered in front of her eyes. Even after all this time she is still plagued with reoccurring nightmares and severe memory. She's faced many obstacles in her life but with the help of her friends and her childhood physiologist, she's made some major progress in dealing with her trauma. She's been accepted into a prestigious school and has slowly started trusting in people again. **

**But that all changes when a broody, cocky, and strangely familiar, transfer student arrives at Hogwarts School for the Gifted. **

**Will the presence of this boy bring her closer to finding the truth about her mother's murder, or bring her closer to the brink of self destruction?**

* * *

_It's dark. _

_She couldn't see. _

_She couldn't feel. _

_Her body had long been numb. _

_All she could hear was the steady sound of her breath as it left her body._

_But even that was becoming shallow. _

_**How long have I been here? **_

_**How long has it been since he left?**_

_**Is he coming back? **_

_The thought scared her. _

_**I don't want him to come…..**_

_Her head snapped up at the sound of the creaking of footsteps on wooden stairs. _

_Her heart raced wildly in her chest. _

_**Will it hurt again?**_

_**Will I die this time? **_

_She'd find out soon enough. _

_The door opened and light pierced the darkness. _

_Crazed blue stared down at her. _

_A grin worthy of a monster, threatened to eat her up. _

_There is something in his hand. _

_But she doesn't move._

_There's no point in struggling._

_She already knew she couldn't escape. _

_She'd accepted it…_

_But truthfully her heart didn't want to die. _

_She shut her eyes tightly. _

_She didn't want to see his face._

_A voice cried out from behind him. "No! Not her! Please! I'll do anything!"_

_**Mum? **_

"_Your sentiment is sweet, my dear. But I'm afraid I can't spare the girl. She was never part of the plan. She's a liability."_

"_Please! I beg of you!" _

_She opened her eyes to see her mother kneeling on the floor by the stairs. Her face bloodied, tears sparkling in her eyes. _

_**Mum, don't cry. **_

_He moved away from her. _

_And finally she could see it clearly._

_The glittering object he was holding…._

_Was a butcher knife._

"_Would you really want to take her place then?" _

_Her mother nodded, her eyes pleading. "Yes! Don't kill her!"_

"_I had high hopes for you, you know." The man said, bending down to cradle her face in his hand. "I really love that body of yours. I always have." _

_She jerked her head back. Still slightly defiant. _

"_Heh, Have it your way then," He spat, grabbing her up off the floor. She knows what is about to happen. _

_She wants to stop him. _

_She wants to scream!_

_But she can't. _

_She's stuck. _

_It's as if her voice is restrained as well. _

_She watches in horror as the knife rests at her mother's throat. _

"_I really don't want to do this to you." He whispers. "I wasn't quite done playing house. But since you want to play the hero, I suppose I will just have to let you go. Perhaps I should just kill you here then, right in front of her, for forcing me to make this decision.."_

"_Just don't hurt her. Let her go."_

_He doesn't reply but he smiles behind her. She mouths the words "I love you" and "I'm sorry." _

_The girl's heart cries out when her mouth can't. _

_**No! Please god no!**_

_The knife slices through flesh. _

_Red splatters on grey concrete. _

_Her body hits the floor. _

_She can hear her choking, gurgling. _

_A pool of red forms beneath her. _

_Her eyes find her daughters. _

_They are pained. _

_But neither of them can do anything, _

_And the red pool is getting closer. _

_That's when she felt something, something warm. _

_It touched her bare feet. _

_She felt like she was going to vomit. _

_She didn't want to see anymore. _

_But she couldn't look away. _

_Her mother was dying._

_Right in front of her. _

_The life was already leaving her eyes. _

_**Is this what it's like to die? **_

_**Mum! **_

_**Mum!**_

_**Please don't leave me! **_

_**Please!**_

_Before she can even try to comprehend what that meant, her view was suddenly blocked. _

_Their captor stood over her, shaking his head. _

"_It's a bloody shame, Jean." He sighed. "I hated to do that, honestly I did."_

_**No! Get away from her! **_

_**Leave us alone! **_

_She wanted to cry, scream. _

_But she couldn't. _

_Her voice was trapped. _

_Tears spill down her cheeks as he reached for her._

"_Hmm, you look a lot like her don't you? Maybe I should just keep you…" He turns back to the doorway. Someone is there but I can't see who it is. "What do you think…."_

_There was no reply. _

_He laughed and untied her._

_She wanted to be at her mother's side. _

_But he held her in his fierce grip. _

_After what seemed like hours,_

_She finally found her voice. _

"_Mom!" _

"_Stop that blasted crying, girl. She's gone. Now it's just us." He grinned and pinned her to the ground. _

_His hand reached down. _

_She screamed louder. _

"_Noo! Stop! Mum!"_

_Her mouth is covered and her body goes numb again._

_She felt the knife at her throat. _

_She squeezed her yyes shut once more. _

_**Let me die. **_

_**Please!**_

_**Make the pain stop! **_

"_Mum!"_

* * *

"Mum! Mum!"

"Hermione, it's ok!" A voice called.

She sat up, sweat pouring from her brow, and her breath coming out in gasps. The light is on and the concerned faces of her dorm mates stared back at her. Ginny was sitting beside her on the bed, her hands calmly stroking Hermione's bare arms.

"S-sorry." She sputtered, trying to regain her composure. She couldn't believe it. The nightmares had decided to return. Just when she was about to start a brand new year.

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah. I'm fine." She lied, trying to still her racing heart.

Ginny didn't seem convinced. "Hermione, you said it again."

She cringed. "Ginny…"

"I think you should go back to see Professor Snape."

_Not that nutter._ "No way."

Her friend shook her head. "I really think you should talk to him more. It seemed to help you last time."

"I don't need to talk to him." She replied, rolling over to face the wall. "I'm fine."

"No you're not. You are having them again. I can't keep worrying about you-"

"Then stop worrying! I can't take it anymore! I'm not an invalid." _Can't she see that? _"I'm not going to die. They are _nightmares_. That's it. I can get over it without the help of a bloody shrink!" Of course that's another lie, but she would do anything to keep herself out of therapy. She could never remember much, and she didn't really want to.

But her words didn't seem to reach her. "It's more than just nightmares. It's part of your PTS-"

"Shut up, Ginny!" She snapped, sitting back up and staring hard at the red head. "Just stop. I don't want to talk about it anymore."

Ginny couldn't hide the hurt in her eyes as she rose from the bed. "Hermione, I'm your best friend. It's part of my job to worry. I just don't want this to eat you up anymore."

"I know, but I just can't," she said, and it was the truth. It was long past midnight and the dream had her stomach in knots. The last thing she wanted to think about was that night. Her friends had no idea the extent of her syndrome. And if she was being honest, she never wanted them to find out the nasty little details.

**P**ost-**T**raumatic **S**tress **D**isorder. It's a technical term for the condition she acquired after that fateful night. . Or so the "professor" said. But she hated to call it that. It made her feel like she was some crazy person who yelled, "Hit the deck!" whenever they heard a car back fire. In her heart she knew she shouldn't think that way. She actually felt sorry for those people, but she didn't want to be classified as one of them.

PTSD was the kind of thing that was only supposed to happen to war veterans, not sixteen year old girls. But despite not actually witnessing and participating in the acts on a battlefield, she was more or less fighting for her life.

Seven years earlier, on the way home from the store one night, Hermione and her mother had been snatched just a block away from the flat they shared with her father. It was a great stroke of bad luck.

She didn't remember much about the weeks she'd lived in the man's cellar. She didn't know his name, or recall what he looked like, but she would forever remember his cold, heartless eyes. That was the only thing she could tell the detectives when they found her, wandering the streets in her underwear and covered in blood. When they brought her to the station she was comatose. She didn't mutter a word until three days later, and she never could tell her where she'd been, where her mother was, or how she'd escaped.

They didn't have to wonder about her mother long. The next day they found her body in a dumpster outside the university she attended. Hermione had no recollection of her mother's demise until a two years later, when her memories started coming back to her in forms of dreams and painful flash backs that could occur any time.

That's when she began seeing Professor Snape. He was the best child psychologist in London, but she honestly didn't care for him much. He made her talk about things, and she'd rather forget the look on my mom's face as she died, and the kidnapper's evil smile as he'd leered at her. The nine year old Hermione had no idea what it had meant, but the sixteen year old does, and it made her sick.

Even now she had to deal with the nightmares. And for a long time she couldn't sleep without the light on. It took her a long time to trust anyone. She still couldn't say she trusted many people, mostly her friends Ginny, Harry, and Ron. But even with them at her side, school had never truly been the same after the incident. Everyone knew she was the kid who was kidnapped. She was the kid who saw her mum die. That went on for at least two years. Everything seem to die down after awhile, but she could still hear the whispers when she walked down the hall. People would move to the other side of the walk way, and shy away from her during classes. She was a pariah and she could hardly blame them. She was odd, always had her nose in a book and kept mostly to herself.

When she'd been accepted into Hogwarts boarding school everything had changed for her. Most of the students didn't know her and she'd actually made a couple of friends. The fresh start really helped. She'd even stopped having panic attacks. And for the most part she felt almost normal. She felt fine, or at least that's what she told herself late at night when all she wanted to do was cry.

Whenever she felt that twinge of despair filling her stomach she tried to think of Harry and Ginny. She tried to think of her friends because she couldn't afford to fall into the darkness again. She couldn't bare it.

She thought about the hurt expression on Ginny's face as she went to her own bunk. Hermione hadn't meant to snap at her like that. She just didn't want to be taken to that dark place again. But she knew she had a decision to make. If she wanted to get rid of the nightmares, and make her friend's worry less, perhaps she needed to go back and see Snape. As much as she loathed to admit it.

She rolled onto her stomach and sighed into her pillow. Tomorrow she'd be a sixth year. She'd have to put on a happy face again.

If her mum were here she'd ruffle her mangy, mangled hair and tell her everything was going to work out, that she could it, that she was strong. But that kind of thought was useless. Her mum was gone. She know that better than anyone.

She couldn't stop the single tear that slid down her cheek and onto her pillow. "Mum….I really miss you." She whispered, closing her eyes and thankfully falling into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

**I don't know what will come of this, but I just had to write it. If you like it, let me know with a review. :D**


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